April 2009
Americans...
Earlier this month, a mother in Texas won a legal bid to have her dead son’s sperm harvested after he died in a fight outside a bar, so she could have the option of carrying out his wish to have children.
this is how he treats me:
Eanerbeaner6: dirty slut
i approve!
the kristen we all know and love
rapmasterrk: i've been to busy being vain.
Erika Hearts YOO: akhgfakfha;lfkha
Erika Hearts YOO: HAHAHA
rapmasterrk: too*
Erika Hearts YOO: i kinda figured
rapmasterrk: yup!
rapmasterrk: :]
Erika Hearts YOO: sitting in front of the mirror, figuring out ways to be even more of a slut
rapmasterrk: that's exactly what i was doing!
rapmasterrk: oh, the possibilities!
Erika Hearts YOO: dirty girl.
rapmasterrk: I AM.
“You want college! SO GO GET IT!”
– Sahil on helping me cope with the upcoming weeks.
out creeped, bitch!
Stranger: Cyber sex?
You: always
Stranger: ok baby are you ready?
You: fucking hurry up!
Stranger: i'm going to do naughty things
You: what do you want to do to me?
Stranger: uh...
You: will you shit on my chest?
Stranger: wtf?
You: can i stick my dick in your mouth?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
omegle. funniest convo yet.
Stranger: do you have a penis or a vaj?
You: vaj
Stranger: how old is your vaj
You: 16
Stranger: where is your 16 year old vaj located
You: california
Stranger: my 25 year old penis is located in ny
You: that's cool.
Stranger: this was a great convo
You: indeed
Stranger: i really feel like i know you
You: we made a real connection there.
Stranger: im really gonna miss you
Stranger: its sad really
Stranger: we're never gonna talk again
You: we are not.
Stranger: makes this moment kinda special
You: it does. it's kind of poetic
Stranger: a tear just rolled down my cheek
Stranger: tasted salty
Stranger: ok i think i love you now
You: that's usually how tears taste.
You: i think i love you too.
Stranger: lets get married, meet me in vegas in 2 years
You: ok.
Stranger: ill be staying at the mgm
Stranger: room 1256
Stranger: 2 years from today
Stranger: bring lube
You: ok. is there significane to that room?
Stranger: it was the room i was born in
Stranger: i remember it like it was yesterday
Stranger: placenta everywhere
You: it will be the room our baby will be conceived in
Stranger: lol
Stranger: i want to have your babies
Stranger: and name them after the moons of jupiter
You: haha. ok.
You: just two more years bb
Stranger: ok ill see you then
You: what will you do in the meantime?
Stranger: love you!
Stranger: ill be thinking of you every waking hour
Stranger: in fact, i just painted a protrait of you
Stranger: to hang on my wall
Stranger: you look beautiful
You: aw. thank you.
Stranger: however, id remove that mole
You: i think you've painted the wrong person
Stranger: you have a mole on your left breast, no?
You: i do not.
Stranger: oh sorry thats a nipple
Stranger: dont remove your nipple
You: haha. i would never think to do such a thing
Stranger: well you live in cali, crazy surgeries n such go on over there
Stranger: why cant you live on my coast??
You: but to get a nipple removed?? that's just absurd
Stranger: when i was your age i once shaved my chest
Stranger: my girlfriend dared me
Stranger: we were at her moms house in florida
Stranger: and i sliced both of my nipples
Stranger: no joke
Stranger: it sucked
Stranger: so bad
You: haha. we just got my friend's chest waxed
You: that sounds ipainful
You: painful**
Stranger: you can see a little cut mark on each nipple
Stranger: worst decision i ever made
Stranger: i got my pubes waxed once and they pulled my balls off
You: did you get them put back on?
Stranger: no i got fake balls put in, like the dogs get when they're neutered
Stranger: except they jingle really loudly
You: but then how are we going to have babies?
Stranger: so you can hear me walking down the hallway
Stranger: totally ruins the element of surprise
Stranger: i froze my sperm at a sperm bank
You: ok. then it's all good.
Stranger: i was gonna use a turkey baster
You: fine by me
Stranger: you can click disconnect now
You: ok. thanks you. see you in 2 years
Stranger: youre clearly bored with me
You: thank**
Stranger: k bye my love
You: it's nothing personal. i still love you
Stranger: lol back atcha
DEFINITELY YES
danapple trees: ;)
rapmasterrk: whaaat!
danapple trees: HAHAH don’t deny it bbygrl
danapple trees: something about
danapple trees: “she was lying on her back
danapple trees: and he was like
danapple trees: on top of her
rapmasterrk: hahaha, oh my god.
rapmasterrk: i feel so slutty.
danapple trees: hehehheehe
danapple trees: HAHA kristen i love you so bad
rapmasterrk: hahaha, why!
danapple trees: TEEHEE TUMBLR?
rapmasterrk: NO!
rapmasterrk: DEFINITELY NOT.
ACTION SLUT
billy eliot?
Anil: Jake, why do you always dance in public? it's kind of embarrassing.
Jake: I was born to dance, boy!
“i’m going to be in middle school jake. i can’t hang out with you...”
– anil
guys in bands. hands in pants.
Randy: lies, they wanna hold MY hand!
me: hahahahaha
Randy: but i said: no i rather keep my hands on my weenie
me: HAHAHAHA
Randy: and im not the only guy
i kind of often have my hand in my pants
its warm ;p
ohdontyoudare:
erikadropsthebeat:
KRISTEN IS A SLUT
DUH FUH?
TRUTH
more slutty conversations (via aim)
D-bang: bang bang motherfuckers street slang
me: been listening to 3oh!3?
D-bang: fuck yeah
on loop for the 20 hours
full album too
i have 6 full albums
me: i've stood in less than five feet in front of them
D-bang: well FU
me: sean held my hand BITCH
D-bang: PSH
dont worry i'll get backstage and chill
me: lol. dang. i've listened to 3oh!3 for almost a year.
i just realized that
cuz it's almost warped again
and i'm gonna see them there too!
D-bang: :o
me: hahaha. the person who'll get you backstage will probably be me
D-bang: prolly
me: since i'm gonna be best friends w/ them
D-bang: unless i have a sex change
or i could just like
steal their guiitar
me: and also, i'll be on nat's dick
D-bang: LOL
me: wut?
that wasn't a joke
D-bang: i know
me: i'm a ttl slut for them
well....him
D-bang: but i haz surprise at outright statement from you
me: you obviously don't know me as well as you think you do
D-bang: guess not :P
i thought david tennant pwnd all
guess that was just me
me: lol. ap tour had a good line up
minus hit the lights, i'd do any of those guys
oh. and minus xanadu, phatty, jared, and nadaddy
D-bang: i'm sure i can find some filthy band member
dunno any of those ppl
me: jared's from the maine
D-bang: must be one ugly fuck
lolwut
GROUPIE
**(now talking about youtube videos)
me: i swear. nat only wears owns one pair of pants
and they're not even pants
they're cut into shorts
D-bang: lol
me: and he wears them with that grey tank
ALWAYS
D-bang: my kinda guy
spending money is for suckas
me: he's a fucking giant
like...literally
6'7"!!! dayum
D-bang: lol
me: he's a hottie though. and i WILL do dirty things with him
D-bang: better hope the physical height corresponds to his penis height :p
me: dgaf if he's in his mid-twenties
age ain't nothin' but a number
i'm on his nuts like a fucking squirell
D-bang: LOL
http: //www.youtube.com/watch?v=UFS6nr45gzo&feature=channel_page
me: ahahhaahha
yes!
i want to be his hand!
D-bang: you mean on his hand :P
me: no! i want to be his hand in this vid
D-bang: o
lol
me: lololol
i just want him in me.
D-bang: LOL
Erika Hearts YOO: "I think i should know/ how to make love to something innocent/ without eaving my fingerprints out"
D-bang: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YFpT2QSDWM0
you can see his cocks size approx
me: hahahahahahahahaha
omg. isn't he just SEXY?
he's a whole foot taller than me
I'M GOING TO WARPED BETCH
D-bang: same
me: my cousin and i have this theory
D-bang: yeah?
me: because we all got sick after the show
cuz sean just got over being sick. and during the concert he held my hand, and i touched all of them, and my hand was then in my mouth from eating a delicious taco from a across the street
so i got his germs and gave them to everyone i was with
D-bang: FU
why couldn't you have made me sick today
didn't want calc test
i hear buzzing
but my phone is on silent
D-bang: i didn't have to take it
well fu you more
derivative of how manys times i tell you FU=everyday
me: hahahaha
don't hate
my cousin and i decided that i'm gonna get nat and she's having sean
D-bang: i call the rest of their groupies then
fuck yeah
me: hahahah
ok
deal
at warped i'm gonna tell sean that he got me sick at the AP tour
D-bang: lol
I DEMAND MONO NOW
KTHX
me: and for an apology he's gonna let me hop right on nat's penis
Erika Hearts YOO: which is ttly okay w/ me
D-bang: lol
so.. you had the cold.. now you want AIDS?
: PPP
realistically speaking
no one on drugs has heard of condomz
me: they're not gonna have aids
hahahahhaa
D-bang: sure?
they seem purty popular
me: i will bring my own condoms if i need to
D-bang: lol
musical condoms..
that plays punk bitch
or starstrukk
me: lol. or we can have unprotected sex.
D-bang: LOL
me: i am DEFINITELY ok w/ that
D-bang: lmao
FUCK HIGH SCHOOL
I HAVE HIS BEBIES
suck it bitches
me: lololololol
SPRING BREAK FINALLY
lawls at el pollo loco following me
KRISTEN IS A SLUT
been up for the past two hours. i feel so lost without my chapstick
Need a nap. Soo glad tomorrow is my last day. Yay for spring break!
just got back from michael’s. gonna tie-dye it up.
hot showers open up blocked nasal passages.
dear internet, please give me my life back.
thank you.
“Too far? It’s never too far!”
– Rishi Udeshi
what if we had to do this
junsez: well that's if i can pass my spanish final
Erika Hearts YOO: hahahahaha
Erika Hearts YOO: i'll help you
junsez: yeah well i have to process an alien
junsez: and not a make a single mistake
uploading pictures from the AP tour. warped anyone?
slutty conversations during concerts (via text...
Pam: Omg this bitch to the right of me needs to die. And i'm getting groped left and right.
Me: hahahahahah. Shit.
Pam: Yeah dude. Fucking like using her hips to shove that shit. and her bf will not let go of her so his arm is like all up on me.
Me: Dayum pam. lol. i think you're having a threesome
Pam: BAHAHAHAHAHAA omg fuck you. it's quite sweaty.
Me: hahahaha. thanks. i know. i'm pretty sure half of the sweat on my body isn't even mine
Pam: hahahahah dude same here. fuck me. my jeans are like off me ass and some one's hand is down there cuz my shirt is kinda lifted and i can't fix it. Hgtyjkf RAPE
Me: FUCK YOU
Pam: Hahahahaha omfg yess. so i have garrett and kennedy's pics now. I need to work on jared's pic and pat's drumstick and john's dick :]
Me: I WILL DO HIM
Pam: hahahah. not before i do.
Me: i'm going to fuck ALL OF THEM
Pam: maybe not jared. GINGER. hahahah but the rest of them yessss.
stuck in my head since saturday.
colorado...